In defence of warts-and-all mum bloggers

Today you may well have seen this take down of some well-known bloggers/authors who write about their experiences of motherhood in all of its wonderful, exhausting and life-changing glory. 

As you’d expect, it’s sparked quite the reaction on social media and some brilliant responses from the writers it features, including this excellent post from The Unmumsy Mum. 

To me, it felt like a piece aimed at making mothers feel even more weighed down with guilt than they already are. 

Find Hurrah for Gin funny ✅? What a bad mother you are. Fed your children fish fingers tonight ✅? You should be ashamed.

I don’t drink gin (I’m an occasional prosecco/cocktail in a can drinker thank you very much) but I do, shock horror, feed my children fish fingers from time to time. And sausages and baked beans and chips of the frozen variety.  

On other days, I’ll lovingly make home made meals, which are often greeted with a melodramatic “yuck” and a refusal to eat, hence the occasional use of fish fingers.

There are days where we go bug hunting, on outdoor adventures, make cakes and have educational trips to farms. There are other days where they scoff Pom Bears and watch more TV than they probably should. 

Since I became a mum more than five years ago, not a day has passed without me feeling guilty. I always worry about being a bad mum. 

I wish I could be less tired, more patient and not flinch at the mere thought of messy play. I wish I was that smiling saintly mum I imagined I’d be, but then I am also a person and a rather knackered one at that.

Until these bloggers and others started writing about this stuff, I thought it was just me that found motherhood pretty hard at times. I love my children fiercely in ways I didn’t know possible, but my word it can be challenging sometimes. 

I blinked away happy and sad tears reading the Unmumsy Mum’s Diary, which I bloody loved. Eloquent and bitingly funny, I found it to be very relateable as well as brilliantly written. 

She and others put their experiences out there and got mothers talking about things they may not have spoken about before. They are shattering the illusions of the Instalives/lies we can all be guilty of presenting on our social media accounts.

Personally, I love how blogging has democratised writing and allowed people across the world to share their stories. It gives a platform to previously hidden voices, a place to share untold stories. 

I think we’re at a fantastic point in history where women’s voices and experiences are being documented and shared like never before. 

Sure, I might not like everything I read on blogs, but I don’t like everything I read in the media either.

So please, back off the parenting bloggers, and all bloggers for that matter. They are taking the time to write about their experiences and put their writing out into the often unforgiving internet.

After all, if you don’t like it, don’t read it.